UwU Mayor Olivia Chow makes me want to kms
Someone give this woman a crack pipe already!
I opened my email today to find I had been forwarded this fucking monstrosity and now I’m being carted away to the psych hospital to be put under suicide watch.
It’s nice to know that Louis Riel was killed so that there could be a stupid “Métis Kitchen Party” in Toronto, a city that has nothing to do with him. I’m sure he would absolutely love a Canadian flag raising. Oh yes and there will be some “jigging.” Can’t wait until New York plans a Nat Turner Day festival with some popping and locking and an NFT auction. I can’t help but imagine what Louis would think of this.
Yeah that’s probably about right.1
I hate UwU Mayor Olivia Chow. I hate her corny ass so much. I hate her spending nearly $13 million dollars to rename a street named after a guy nobody in Toronto even knew existed in the first place until some petition went around (and someone who it may even be argued actually helped abolish slavery2), claiming that this will help us all “move on” from a racist legacy, all while working in an office that has a statue of WINSTON FUCKING CHURCHILL by the front door. Look outside your office, Mayor Chow! You can probably see him!
Oh well, so there’s a statue of a racist mass murderer with a body count in the millions in front of Mayor Chow’s office, Churchill, a man who once said about the Chinese (you know, that ethnicity that Mayor Chow is?): “I hate people with slit eyes and pigtails. I don't like the look of them or the smell of them.” Sure, getting rid of the thing would probably cost a lot less than the $13 million dollars that renaming Dundas St. is going to cost—hell, give me a crowbar and I’ll do it for free—for a city that is on the verge of a Detroit-tier economic collapse because it’s a city that has staked its entire economy on a housing bubble (that is rupturing) and a financial industry indelibly tied to the aforementioned housing bubble (thanks to all the mortgages involved)… but I suppose the Mayor has bigger priorities. Like temporarily naming a street after Taylor Swift!!!!
I hate UwU Chow I hate UwU Chow I hate UwU Chow. Look at these freaks! Look at them! They’re unveiling a fucking street sign for a billionaire psychopath while wearing poppies symbolizing the millions of innocent young men who were ground up into dog food in the fields of Flanders for the interests of some rich assholes. Olivia, Toronto still has a school named after a man who killed two million of his own men in that war—some of them from Toronto—with the hopes of figuratively jamming the enemy machine guns with their blood and guts. It’s the biggest fucking school in the city. Just blatant disrespect. Although, hey, you know what they say, there’s no anti-Swifties in foxholes. God, this is starting to make me miss the fucking crackhead mayor.
Toronto will pay for its crimes.
Satire. Parody. Comedy. I am not advocating for the murdering of civil servants. I mean, not at this exact moment, anyway.
Don’t believe me? Well, you could do what those countless petition-signers neglected to do, which was to Google his name, click the very first link (his Wikipedia page), and read it for less than sixty seconds. This is from Dundas’ Wiki:
Three weeks after the vote, Dundas tabled resolutions setting out a plan to implement gradual abolition by the end of 1799. At that time he told the House that proceeding too quickly would cause West Indian merchants and landowners to continue the trade "in a different mode and other channels".[21] He argued that "if the committee would give the time proposed, they might abolish the trade; but, on the contrary, if this opinion was not followed, their children yet unborn would not see the end of the traffic."[22] […]
Between 1792 and 1807, when the slave trade was eventually abolished, another half a million Africans were transported into slavery in the British colonies. Dundas insisted that any abolition of the slave trade could not succeed without the support of West Indian colonial legislatures. Abolitionists argued that West Indian assemblies would never support such measures, and that by making the abolition of the slave trade dependent on colonial reforms, Dundas was in effect indefinitely delaying it.[28] There is evidence, however, that Dundas had secured agreement of the West Indians before proposing the eight-year timeline.[29] Recent peer-reviewed scholarship has also identified new archival evidence showing that Dundas had the support of several leading abolitionists, while the West Indian slave owners opposed his plan just as much as they opposed immediate abolition.[26]
Dundas may have been right. If the British abolished the slave trade all at once, then the West Indian plantations would probably just work out a black market alternative that would absolutely prove to be even less humane. Sure, the British government could wash their hands of it, but Black people would still suffer. On the other hand, if the abolition was merely on the horizon, then the West Indian plantations might more seriously pursue alternatives. You know what would have been far better, though? Immediate and full, unambiguous abolition of slavery outright. But the question that was on the table in renaming the street was “did Dundas intentionally extend the slave trade?” And the answer seems to be “yes, but one may reasonably argue it was to help more assuredly end it.” I don’t think that kind of historically-ambiguous answer warrants spending $13 million in a city about to go bankrupt.
I named Churchill as someone who deserves to have his statue removed—people actually know who he is, his legacy is unambiguously evil, propagating his legacy is therefore actually bad because that is a legacy that actually registers in people’s minds, and it wouldn’t cost much to tear that statue down—but instead some politician no one in Toronto remembered got his street renamed, thereby validating countless more petitions I’m sure will pop up demanding more millions for other materially-irrelevant acts. Toronto also has a Victoria St., and Queen Victoria was an absolutely certifiable pile of shit, maybe we can rename that one too, that way the drug addicts at the safe injection site at the corner of Dundas and Victoria can sleep easy on their carboard beds knowing they’re not desperately shooting up in miserable poverty somewhere problematic. Oh, right, nevermind, they moved that safe injection site so that they could gentrify the area. I guess they needed to “move on,” right Mayor Chow?